October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Domestic violence, also known as intimate partner abuse, is best understood as a pattern of abusive behaviors used by one intimate partner against another to gain, maintain or regain power and control in the relationship.
It is important to know the warning signs of intimate partner abuse, so please take a few moments to familiarize yourself with how this type of abuse tends to manifest.
Someone experiencing intimate partner abuse may feel . . .
- Constantly put down or criticized by their partner
- They are giving up things that are important to them, such as school, family or friendships
- Worried about their partner’s anger
- Scared of their partner’s unpredictability
- They are scanning for when the next eruption of anger will come
- Embarrassed for people to know how their partner treats them
Don't ignore it: How to support a friend who is in an abusive relationship
The Office of Victim Assistance shares tips and resources for supporting a friend who may be in an abusive relationship.
Their partner may . . .
- Want to make all the decisions
- Try to control what their partner does, how they look, who they see and talk to
- Read their partner’s emails, texts and call frequently to check up on them
- Manipulate with insults, guilt and/or threats
- Prevent their partner from working, studying or socializing
- Use money to control their partner
- Threaten to hurt their partner, loved ones or themselves
- Keep close track of where and what their partner is doing at all times
- Force their partner into unwanted sexual activity
- Destroy partner’s property, threatens pets
- Push, shove, slap and/or hit their partner
If you are concerned about a relationship you are in or have been, or if you are concerned about a friend’s relationship, visit CU Boulder’s Office of Victim Assistance, a free and confidential advocacy and counseling center on campus for students, staff and faculty.
They are located in room S440 on the fourth floor of the Center for Community (C4C), open from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Friday. You can also email assist@colorado.edu or call 303-492-8855 for help, which offers after-hours phone counselors.
