It’s common to feel uncomfortable with different aspects of our body. However, sometimes this dissatisfaction can start to take a toll on our mental and physical health. Here are some tips to help yourself or a friend with negative body image.
What is body image?
Body image refers to the way we view our physical appearance and how we imagine our bodies look to others. People with positive body image generally feel comfortable and confident in their bodies, while people with negative body image may feel anxious, awkward or ashamed about their bodies. It’s also important to keep in mind that we may view our bodies in a distorted or inaccurate way that may not always align with reality.
Someone who is struggling with negative body image may:
Keep in mind that negative body image can impact anyone, regardless of their identity, age, gender or body size.
How can I support a friend with negative body image?
Depending on how intensely someone experiences negative body image, it can be a difficult issue to overcome. Here are some ways you can support a friend who may be experiencing negative body image.
Be open and honest about your concerns
If you’re concerned about a friend’s behavior, let them know privately. Try to provide specific examples of times when you felt worried or concerned about them (e.g. they avoided an event or occasion because of food or body concerns, they were particularly critical of themselves, their eating or exercise habits changed, etc.). Be sure to use “I” statements when expressing your concerns. Here are a few examples you can use:
Allow your friend time to process and respond to conversations you have around body image, especially when sharing your concerns. Approaching your friend with compassion can go a long way. It’s also important to avoid trying to diagnose or label your friend’s habits or experiences.
Set an example
People may engage in negative self-talk without even realizing it. Commenting on our appearance, physical activity or eating habits can be commonplace in some friendships or relationships. If your friend is struggling with negative body image, sometimes the best thing we can do is set a positive example. Practicing self-acceptance and self-compassion allows us to hold space not only for ourselves, but for our friends as well.
Here are some examples of things to avoid when setting a positive example:
Build them up
Remind your friends that you love them for who they are, not what they look like. While there is nothing wrong with complimenting your friend on their appearance, keep compliments focused on something other than their body shape or size, as you may unintentionally cause harm. Instead, focus on things other than their body like how much you like their hair color, their new outfit or their new shoes. It can also be helpful to compliment people on things that are completely unrelated to appearance. For instance, you may let your friend know how funny they are, how brave they are, how smart they are or how great of a person they are. Focusing on inner qualities can help shift attention away from someone’s appearance and let them know they are valued as a person.
This can also be helpful if your friend encounters a situation that makes them feel uncomfortable about their body. For instance, if someone in their class makes a negative comment about their appearance, remind them that the people who really matter in their life care about them regardless of their appearance.
Unfollow accounts on social media
Social media can impact our self-esteem, even if it’s not obvious. If you or your friend follow accounts that impact your body image, self-esteem, self-worth or are negatively impacting your mental health: unfollow them. Instead, take some time to seek out accounts that promote body positivity, body neutrality and self-love. For instance, it can be helpful to look for accounts that promote Health at Every Size (HAES).
If you’re concerned a friend might be experiencing negative body image or is engaging in concerning or harmful behaviors, check out the resources below for additional information and support.