Sexual Assault, Stalking & Abuse in a Relationship

People often think that consent is something that you "get" or "give" in a sexual situation, but this is limited. Consent is more of an agreement that people arrive at together. Consent can include words or actions that create mutually understandable, clear willingness and acceptance of the conditions of any sexual activity. Read more about what consent actually looks like.

• Consent must be established through clear words or actions.
• A person who does not want to consent to sex is not required to resist.
• Consent to some forms of sexual activity does not imply consent to other sexual activities.
• Silence, previous sexual relationships, or the existence of a current relationship do not imply consent.
• Consent cannot be implied by how someone is dressed or inferred from the giving or acceptance of gifts, a ride, money, or other items.
• People can change their minds and consent can be withdrawn at any time during sexual activity and it need not be a verbal withdrawal as long as it is conveyed clearly.
• Under Colorado law, a person under the age of 15 cannot legally consent to sex with someone who is 4 or more years older than they are. A person who is 15 or 16 cannot legally consent to sex with someone who is more than 10 years older. 

Incapacitation is when a person is unable to give consent due to the effects of alcohol or other drug use, or other factors such as sleep, illness, or disability.

Incapacitation is a state where a person cannot make a rational, reasonable decision because they lack the capacity to understand the who, what, when, where, why, or how of sexual activity. The use of alcohol or drugs, in and of itself, does not render a person incapacitated, nor is it a defense against an allegation of sexual misconduct. 

Signs of incapacitation that would indicate a person is unable to consent:

• Disorientation, which could include a person losing track of where they are or who they are with, being confused or unable to remember basic information, or repeating themselves (lack of short-term memory)
• Loss of motor control, which means a person may not be able to do basic things like inserting a key in a lock, not be able to get something out of a wallet, not be able to dress or undress or walk on their own
• Unconsciousness, including being asleep or passed out

These factors are used to determine a person's capacity to consent to sexual activity. 

Any unwelcome, non-consensual conduct of a sexual nature, sexual contact, or sexual penetration. Examples can include:

• Vaginal or anal penetration and any contact between a mouth and genitals without affirmative consent.
• Non-consensual recording of sexual activity or photographs of another person's intimate parts, or invasion of sexual privacy.
• Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other unwelcome verbal, non-verbal, or physical conduct of a sexual nature.
• Here are 5 things everyone should know about sexual assault.
• Learn more about supporting a male friend who is sexually assaulted.

Behaviors in an intimate, sexual, dating, partnered, or marital relationship directed at a person that are controlling, demeaning, intimidating, or threatening. This includes threats, assault, violence, property damage, and violence or threat of violence to one's self or to the loved ones of the person. Read more about healthy, unhealthy, and abusive relationships.

​ A pattern of conduct directed at someone that would cause them to fear for their own safety or the safety of others or suffer substantial emotional distress, including causing a person to alter their daily activities.  

• A responsible employee who becomes aware of sexual misconduct (including sexual assault, exploitation and harassment, intimate partner violence, and stalking), discrimination, or harassment involving any member of the CU community must inform OIEC.
• This applies whether the member of our community is the person who was subjected to the misconduct or the person accused of the misconduct.
• This applies regardless of where or when an incident occurred, including if it occurred off campus and/or before they were a member of the campus community.
• This applies regardless of how the information was conveyed to a responsible employee (whether spoken, written, or through a third party).

The purpose of mandatory reporting is to ensure safety, offer support and resources (such as the Office of Victim Assistance), understand the scope of the concern, and to get the behavior to stop.

When in doubt, contact OIEC for further guidance at 303-492-2127 or report at cureport@colorado.edu.