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How to support a friend through rough times

Traumatic events happen every day, and the CU Boulder community is not exempt. Students, staff and faculty can experience harassment, discrimination, assaults, abuse and more.

The way we respond when someone shares their experience matters—it can influence that person’s decision to seek help and affect their healing process.

Many of us want to help in these situations, but we might not know how to respond. The Office of Victim Assistance (OVA) has provided tips and information on how to support those impacted by a traumatic or painful event.

If someone shares with you that they have experienced a traumatic event:

Listen to what they need

  • Remain calm
  • Listen without judgment
  • Believe them

Don’t second guess them

  • Don’t tell them what to do
  • Don’t pressure them
  • Let them make their own decisions
  • Support them in their decisions about what is best for them

Be there for them

Reach Out

OVA is a free and confidential on-campus service for students, faculty and staff who’ve experienced a traumatic or life-disruptive event. If you or someone you know has been impacted by harassment, discrimination, sexual assault, intimate partner abuse, stalking, hazing, physical assault and or experiences of bias, reach out to OVA for free and confidential counseling, support and advocacy.

The office is open from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., and drop-in hours are 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Monday – Friday in C4C N352, or call 303-492-8855. After-hours contact information can be found on OVA’s website.

If you have experienced a traumatic or disruptive experience, you can also learn more about your options and how to help by visiting the Don’t Ignore It site.

    • Stay up with them
    • Cry with them
    • Laugh with them
    • Don’t expect them to be sad or happy all the time
    • Go for a walk with them
    • Talk with your friend about campus resources and support
    • Let them know they have rights and options

    Help take care of their physical needs

    • Let them stay with you
    • Check on their safety
    • Make them food
    • Send a care package
    • Give them a ride
    • Make a call for them
    • Help them find a doctor or counselor
    • Take care of their pets
    • Help them find a new home

    For a full list of ways to support a survivor, visit OVA’s website.