Dear Faculty Relations – I often find myself spending more hours on my work and research than what is even expected of me from my department. This has created some problems at home—I feel distracted or less available to my family and friends. Is there something that can be done? – Stretched Too Thin
Dear Stretched Too Thin – What you’re likely referring to is an imbalance of work and life. There are many responses to how to add balance, including having an honest conversation with your department about what’s being expected of you. That said, let’s focus today on what you could implement immediately.
Speaking frankly, where we spend our time is an indictment of where we are investing our presence. Think about what this statement means to you—where and with whom have you invested your time? Is this how you would like for things to continue? How else could it look?
There is no wrong answer, by the way. The “right” answer is what is most right for you, your family, and the lifestyle you want to cultivate. Be intentional, not accidental, about how you want to show up as a parent, partner, friend, etc. While we cannot create more hours in our day, we can increase our engagement when we are around important people in our lives.
Keep this in mind: 10-minutes of present-mindedness is more valuable than 2-hours of half-attention (e.g., being with a friend while on your phone checking work emails).
Remember, you can always contact Faculty and Staff Assistance Program for professional support. Services are exclusively available to CU Boulder faculty and staff members and their families at no cost.
Written by Stanley Ly, MA, Director of Faculty and Staff Assistance Program, University of Colorado Boulder, April 2022