Alone on Valentine’s Day?

February 8, 2013

Feb. 8, 2013               Glenda Russell

The reminders are everywhere. Candy hearts and roses are displayed prominently in grocery stores while radio and TV ads for jewelry and chocolates are broadcast daily. They’re reminders that it’s time to spoil your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day.

But what if you’re single and feeling left out? How do you handle Valentine’s Day alone?

The answer? Find others just like you and do something fun together, says CU-Boulder counselor and psychologist Glenda Russell.

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Audio Script

Alone on Valentine’s Day?

Feb. 8, 2013               Glenda Russell

The reminders are everywhere. Candy hearts and roses are displayed prominently in grocery stores while radio and TV ads for jewelry and chocolates are broadcast daily. They’re reminders that it’s time to spoil your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day.

But what if you’re single and feeling left out? How do you handle Valentine’s Day alone?

The answer? Find others just like you and do something fun together, says CU-Boulder counselor and psychologist Glenda Russell.

CUT 1 “One of the things you can do is go look for people who need company on Valentine’s Day.  Find them and do something together.  Make it fun - go to a movie together, go to dinner together, go for a run together -(:12) do something that the two of you or the three of you or the four of you could genuinely enjoy.  And help each other.” (:19)

Russell says, if you are single and feel left out because you don’t have a companion on Valentine’s Day, take a moment to reflect and realize that being alone is OK.

CUT 2 “For people who are alone, the first question I think they need to ask themselves - is what message they’re giving themselves about the meaning of them being alone?  Often times people get into catastrophizing messages about, ‘this means I am not loveable, this means I am never going to be loved, this means it’s the end of the world.’ Well almost never does it mean any of those things. (:20) In fact, what it usually means is right now I am not in a relationship. That’s a far cry from this sense that this has huge momentous negative implications for my happiness today and forever.  It doesn’t.  It just means you’re alone now.” (:29) 

Russell says another thing a single person can do to feel involved on Valentine’s Day is to do something for someone else you care about.

CUT 3 “Valentine’s Day is a great day to send a card to your grandmother. Valentine’s day is a great day to send an email to somebody with whom you went to high school and say, ‘I’m thinking about you because you were really special in my life.’ (836) And doing that, literally, just doing one of those things, takes the edge off the anxiety of Valentine’s Day and it also takes the edge off of that loss that you feel, that some people feel, if they’re not involved in some big romantic relationship over Valentine’s Day.” (:31)

Alone or not from a commercial standpoint, Americans spend more on Valentine’s Day than on any other holiday. According to the National Retail Federation, last year Americans spent $17.6 billion on candy, balloons, paper cards and other tokens of love. That’s more than any other American holiday.

-CU-

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