Mother’s Faith
Rene van Meter
Mothers give advice that often seems nonsensical to their children. There are times when these words of wisdom pop up unbidden—a leap of faith.
I sat in the lawyer’s office rolling a pen between my fingers. Although I wasn’t alone in the room, I was totally abandoned. This was the final moment. If I signed this paper there was no going back. I was filled with doubt. I knew that I must embrace this inky blackness or I would never find peace. Sometimes you must jump off the cliff, and have faith that you will be saved from crashing on the jagged rocks.
Mothers sacrifice for their children in ways beyond understanding. The mother’s hope is to one day be understood—a leap of faith.
I signed the final paper. I signed it and I cried. I cried for all that I was giving, for all that I was losing, for all that I was hoping. With leaden legs, I stumbled off the cliff, and the wind whistled past my ears. My hair whipped into my mouth as I screamed, “Who will save me from the unknown?” Falling, I twisted to look at the depths below, but there was only darkness. Where was my faith?
Mothers wait—hoping that the fruit of their labor will thrive. If a mother does it right, her child will know—a leap of faith.
He’s a young man now. He is not the baby I hold in my heart. With all the care a mother can muster, I took that leap of faith. I’m still waiting for the arms to envelop me and save me from the inevitable end. Maybe there is no bottom to this free fall. Perhaps, I was saved on the day that I staggered over the edge.
