Sometimes, you seak the hum drum. You yearn for a daily routine, a solid schedule that becomes so consistent you could navegate between classes, work, and school with your eyes closed. It allows you to make plans far in advance, to allot time to get your homework done so you can go out with your friends all weekend. Your life syncs with a calender, with a clock. It ticks as you go; it's simple.
I want to shatter the humdrum. Routine exhausts me. Already this semester, I've fallen into a schedule of when I work out, when I go to class, when I go to work, when I see my friends. It's monotonous, and, despite the comfort inherent in following a consistent schedule, it's making me antsy. I want to go, I want to see, I want to do. I don't want my life to be defined by my planner; I want to fly by the seat of my pants and see where I'll end up. But, when you're chained by exorbitant tuition rates to attending your classes and are required to work if you want to buy groceries, the humdrum syncopates itself in your mind. It becomes your downbeat, your rythym, marching you onward while erasing the fledgling that's trying to get out.
Getting sucked into the hum drum is easy, but, I think getting out of it is simple enough. Defy your rules and regulations-- I'm getting out of Boulder this weekend and the next, and I don't care who knows it. I'm freeing myself; reminding myself of the effervescence of spontenaity and how it can lift the spirit. I'm eschewing a non-mandatory responsibility by deciding to give up my internship, which quite frankly has morphed from the route to my dreams to the depletion of my energy. It's part of the humdrum; and overload will do nothing to a person but weigh them down, leading them to function less productively. It's the meanality filing of papers and data entry that are inflating my perceived humdrum and subsequently causing me to go biserk.
It was a big decision-- to give up something that could "look so good on a resume." But at what cost?
I'm sticking it to the humdrum- I'm leaving town and not looking back for a whole weekend. I hoping this will invigorate me again, restore my energy so that I can committ myself to doing something new and different; to compel myself to forever reject the humdrum.