Still Searching


   I came to college hoping I would find my passion.  Since I was a young child, I dreamed of finding a career I would love.   In my first three semesters of college, I sampled classes from many different departments.  I enjoyed some of my classes, but I didn't feel that I had discovered what I should do with my life.  Unfortunately, I had to pick a major, unless I wanted to drop out.   I felt that I needed to stay in school to get a good job.   I chose to major in economics.   My true goal has always been to find a job that would hold my interest and make me feel challenged and satisfied, whether it paid a lot or not.  Since, I had not found that yet, I chose to major in economics, a field that should pay reasonably well.  I also figured that the range of possibilities for my career would be much larger if I finished by bachelors degree with any major. Some of economics interests me, but I do not feel that it is how I want to spend my life. As an economics major, I have learned economic theory and used technology to evaluate current economic trends. I think of computers and the Internet as great resources, but I do not find them particularly interesting.  I do not spend much free time playing on a computer or searching the Internet.  Still, I learned to use computers and the Internet because they are a vital part of jobs in economics and the rest of the world today.   

   While I have used the Internet, for school as well as my personal life, since high school, I was introduced to programs for statistical analysis in economics classes.   I have also learned about a few different programming languages, while in economics and other college courses.   Computers have helped to increase my productivity.   Instead of writing an essay on paper and then typing it out, I write on my computer; it is then easier to revise and change.   I can also save time by sending an email instead of calling or visiting someone in person.   Computer programs are very important in the field of economics.  They allow us to analyze data and quickly look for trends.   Without programs like Excel and SAS, it would be terribly time-consuming to do data analysis. While I have experience with various applications of technology, I generally do not understand it very deeply.   I know how to use programs, but I do not know why they work. I do not believe that this will be a disadvantage to me in the future.   My limited technological skill should be enough for a job in economics or many other fields.

            Today, my academic identity is not clearly defined.   After almost four years of college, I know a little bit about a lot of different subjects.  Through my college classes, I have gained experience with some new technologies.  While computers, software and the Internet have helped me get through my classes, I do not consider them an important part of my identity.   Since I am still searching for something that I should do with my life, my academic experience, and my interaction with technology, so far, have not shaped me drastically.  I still consider my personal life; my family, my friends, my dog and my travel; more important than anything I have done academically. Perhaps, one day, that will change.  I am open to the possibility of finding a job I will love and more clearly defining myself academically. Perhaps, I'm too idealistic and I will never find what I am looking for, but I don't want to give up yet.  This quest may lead me back to school in the future, but I will look for a job in economics, first.  My experience in the job market may give me insight into what I really want in my life.  Whether I work in a field related to economics or eventually discover a career I love, I am bound to need to use computers and other technology in the future.